The rules

The rule that started it all
The "Bastian Schweinsteiger" rule
Action
Take a drink whenever Bastian Schweinsteiger’s name is mentioned by the commentator OR whenever you see it in text pre-, during and post-Germany matches.

• Optional (but highly encouraged): yell "Schweinsteiger" before you take your drink.
  

Note: The rules that follow in this guide are meant to enhance your World Cup viewing experience, but are meant to be followed responsibly. The authors of this guide do not condone drinking to excess—excepting, of course, when it pertains to themselves.

Sincerely,
Your BSWCDG hosts

The following are the rules of the BSWCDG. They're in no particular order, and you may pick and choose the rules you follow to suit your World Cup drinking needs.

Note that the authors of these rules chose to deviate from some of the more traditional "ball goes out, take a drink" rules that can be found in many other World Cup drinking games. That's not to say that we don't have our fair share (e.g., yellow card/red card), but we chose to do something a little different. If a more traditional game is your style, we encourage you to adapt these rules as you see fit.

Rule
The Bastian Schweinsteiger “stand-in” rule
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For all non-Germany matches, pick a player. That player becomes your “Bastian Schweinsteiger” for the duration of the game and the Bastian Schweinstager rule—in full—will apply.

• Optional (encouraged for games occurring many hours after first call): your table picks the same player for sake of ease.
  

Rule
The “first goal” rule
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Write down or state out loud who you predict will score the first goal. If you’re right, everyone else at your table takes three drinks.

Rule
The “Zakumi” rule
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Take a drink when you see Zakumi, the 2010 World Cup mascot. Take two drinks if he’s molesting a hot chick...he's a dirty, dirty lion-thing.

Rule
The “Mandela” rule
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Take a drink whenever the camera pans to Nelson Mandela in the stands.

Rule
The “useless stats rule” rule
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Football commentators are a goldmine when it comes to spewing completely useless facts and stats (e.g., Bastian Schweinsteiger has run 950 kilometres in this match so far) that have nothing at all to do with game play. Take a drink if the urge strikes you. Caution: US commentators—who know nothing about the sport of football—tend to be overly zealous in their use of these stats, so you may want to just take baby sips.

Rule
The “WAG” rule
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Self-explanatory rule where you take a drink whenever a WAG comes on screen. Take two drinks if it’s Victoria Beckham.

Rule
The “John Terry cries” rule
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Sadly, it’s not that difficult to make this Chelsea skipper shed some tears. Take three drinks when the inevitable happens.

Rule
The “Nicklas Bendter is the greatest player in the world” rule
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Gunners-specific (Or Denmark supporters, if you’re out there) rule: Kaka, Messi, Ronaldo, Crouch—many players have the distinction of being called the “the best in the world” by commentators. But one player who will never be called is Nicholas Bendtner. When a player as referred to as “the best” make your Gooner friends yell “NO, NICHOLAS BENDTNER IS THE GREATEST PLAYER IN THE WORLD!” And then they take a drink.Then you mock them.

Rule
The “yellow card/red card” rule
Action
Take a drink when a player is shown a yellow card. Take two for the second. Take three for an automatic red.

• Optional: for fun, have each person at your table state who they think the first card will go to. If you’re right, everyone at the table takes a drink but you. Helpful hint—when watching Serbia matches, you can never go wrong with Nemanja Vidić.

Rule
The “manager” rule
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Managers are frequently shown on the television screen. Drink when this happens and keep drinking until they are no longer on the screen.

Rule
The "lamenting Theo Walcott" rule
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England supporters: take a drink whenever the ball goes to a goal kick because Emile Heskey wasn't fast enough.
All other supporters: just take a drink when the ball goes to a goal kick. Unless you have your very own Emile Heskey, in which case, by all means apply the rule the same way.

Rule
The “swears” rule
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Take a drink when you see a player cuss at another player. Take two if they swear at the ref. Take three if it’s Fernando Torres—because he looks like he’s 11 (and looks like a girl).

Rule
The “goal” rule
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Self-explanatory: Take a drink when a goal is scored.

Rule
The “waving flag” rule
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For patios only: Take a drink when you see a flag in a car window. Take two drinks if it’s the team you support. Take three drinks if the song “Waving Flag” happens to be playing.

Rule
The “penalty miss” rule
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Take a drink when a player misses a penalty kick. Take two drinks when he misses during a shoot-out.

Rule
The “I can’t believed he missed that” rule
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Take a drink when a player inexplicably misses a completely open net (i.e., he gets passed the keeper and all he has to do is walk it in). AKA "Bendtner rule #2."

Rule
The “same club, opposing country” rule
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The World Cup sees players who normally play on the same club on opposing teams so it’s inevitable that many of them will be on the pitch at the same time. Take a drink if you see them interact. Take three drinks if there’s body contact.

Rule
The "beer ad" rule
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Take a drink when you see a beer ad. Why? Because you need something to do during halftime. Take two drinks if it's the brand of beer you happen to be drinking.

Rule
The "blow your own horn" rule
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The vuvuzela is a South African horn that sounds much like an elephant, and there are expected to be many a vuvuzela (Vuvuzela? Vuvuzeli?) at World Cup matches. Which is great, because nothing makes more sense in a 80,000 person stadium than the noise of an animal known for trampling people to death enclosed spaces. Take a drink when you see a fan blowing into a vuvuzela. Multiply the number of drinks by the number of people blowing into a vuvuzela on the screen at one time.


Rule
The "Jabulani" rule
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You know that football is a man's sport because they've gone ahead and named their ball. Take a drink whenever "Jabulani" is mentioned by name. Take two drinks when it's in reference to the complaints that have been coming from the players about how it performs. Yet another example of how nothing good can ever come from naming one's balls.


Stay tuned. There's more to come.